OH was working a late shift last night and tonight and I'm getting bored with just the dog to talk to. I've phoned various people for a chat throughout different stages of the day but nothing compares to having someone to cuddle up to on the couch. Don't get me wrong I could've gone out with friends today but I'm not really in the mood for idle chit chat. A short conversation on the phone has been enough to keep me in contact with the outside world without me having to strain myself! Sometimes I feel it's a struggle with some of my friends to keep the conversation flowing and I just can't be bothered like I used to. I'm my own worst enemy at times. I get lonely on my own after a long period by myself but I hardly make the effort with my friends anymore.
I don't know what's wrong with me. I just can't be bothered. It does feel a bit like depression again but I only feel like this when I'm on my own for a while. Lately I've been so busy that I haven't had time to feel down or lonely. I have noticedin general that I have been smiling and laughing more; this has also been noticed by OH which he's pleased about. He has put up with so much over the past 8 years. As much as I moan about him and sometimes contemplate whether the grass is greener he has been my rock and is proud of me, always wants what's best for me and puts up with my strops! We've had our problems and prob will have some more but I'm starting to feel more hopeful about our future together.
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