OH and I had a brief chat a few days ago which has left me a-wondering. We have been having a few financial problems that has resulted in us having to put off our wedding plans and the likes. To cut a long story short,whilst I was at university, we spent on credit without thinking of the consequences and, as a result, we are paying for it now. Probably ten-fold. Anyhoo, we've taken hold of the situation and are managing, barely.
Back to the original topic, OH told me the other day he had a 3 and 5 year plan for us. Eh? He's a dark horse that one. He told me that at the end of the 5 years we would have paid off everything we owe and then we can get married and, wait for it, have a baby. Holy moly. A b-b-baby?? I've always said that I wanted children however I'd always thought that it was years away and I had ages to think about and plan it. Now I'm 26 and he's 39 - neither of us are getting any younger.
Recently I have been thinking more seriously about having kids and I find myself starting to long for it. I'm not at the desperado stage yet however having him mention it and realising he's actually wanting to consider it has made me realise that, yes, I do want to be someone's mummy. Bizarre.
The weird thing is until about 6 months ago I still felt like a teenager and no way felt old enough to be a parent. Now my feelings are changing, I feel closer to being ready. Also, my new job is the first job where I've had the security to be able to even think about getting pregnant and going on maternity leave.
I know we're still talking about 5 years away however that gives us time to sort out our finances and for me to build a career for myself in the meantime.
I feel like I'm finally growing up...I like it! I am starting to feel more content. I never really had focus before whether it be in my job, with money or anything else important. But now I feel like I'm more in control and it makes a helluva difference to your whole outlook on life.
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